Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

How would you feel if your girlfriend had dick pics on her phone?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

Why is my stomach getting so big from taking testosterone cypionate 31 to 34 in 2 months?

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I can count

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

Why do some guys treat girls so badly?

I actually pay taxes

I understand how hurricane paths work

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

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I have complete contempt for fakery

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

What are the pros and cons of banning homosexuality?

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t buy bullshit

What was your first experience like with a black man?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

What are the core beliefs of liberalism and conservatism? Can you provide a list of defining characteristics for each side?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

What is your language's pangram?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

Which is better, a naked picture of some one you know or porn videos?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

Im a 14 year old girl who doesnt want to wear a hijab but my parents force me to wear one. It makes me dislike it more. Im not ready for one no matter what people say and they get really mad at me. I have bad grades and no motivation. What do I do?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

What are the withdrawal symptoms of Klonopin 1mg?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

Have you ever met someone and something seemed so unusual about them but you couldn't put your finger on what it was?

I see through liars

I have a reading level above third grade

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t cotton to rapists

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I can read

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink